8 day count down.

My sweet, little baby boy is almost.....two.

I can feel the tears coming now.

I can't believe these years have gone by SO fast, where has it gone?!
He says a new word almost every day, he's brilliant. ;)

I see him now in a size 4t shirt (it looks like it fits perfectly..i think it's stretchy), How did he grow into that? Just yesterday he was swimming in newborn onesies.
Have I mentioned how much he LOVES playing with balls? Soccer balls, footballs, tennis balls, bouncy balls...he's obsessed.
He plays soccer all day with his Sabba and CoCo, how did he learn how to kick a ball? I didn't have an hour long session teaching him all these new things he knows. he's brilliant.

Have I mentioned he's a dancer? What a dancer!! it's like he's choreographed each dance to each particular song that happens to come on the radio, He knows when it's appropriate for a slow spin or a quick hop or two. He's brilliant.

We got him a Dog on Saturday, a Labradoodle (long story) but he immediately knew it was his Dog. He ran around calling her "My", He knows how to play tag with her, walk her on her leash ( with assistance) and feed her (also with assistance). He's brilliant!
We named her Daisy, she's going to be a great dog for him.

I have 8 days until this little smarty pants turns 2, and 5 days until his birthday party. I have a long list of things I need to accomplish by Sunday but I honestly want to spend all day holding him, watching sesame street and holding back tears thinking of his baby days. How much I'll miss this cuddling, how i've enjoyed so much watching a little piece of my heart grow up, but at the same time this gut wrenching sadness that it's all happened too fast and I'll never have these same days again.

I hear over and over how much I'll enjoy every stage of life, but I see my husband, my brother, my dad..they don't have these cuddly, gushy, lovey, needy, cute, squishy relationships with their moms (honestly that would be weird). But that mother heart inside me never wants to lose that relationship! I always want him to need me, cuddle me, love me, reach for me, call my name when he needs me, cry for me, all of those things that makes your heart melt.

This is apart of growing up.

No language can express the power, and beauty, and heroism, and majesty of a mother's love.  It shrinks not where man cowers, and grows stronger where man faints, and over wastes of worldly fortunes sends the radiance of its quenchless fidelity like a star.  ~Edwin Hubbell Chapin

Child Rearing..I. Am. Not. Perfect.

Disclaimer: I am in no means perfect, I do not think I am perfect nor do I think my ways are better then your ways. This is strictly my opinion and I understand some might disagree with me.

I am a strong believer in the scripture that says: "Train up a child in the way he should go,
Even when he is old he will not depart from it."
Proverbs 22:5-7
I believe this verse is for the modern day christian. 


Every night as I lay Julien in his bed to go to sleep I pray over him for the desires of his heart, that the Lord will instill in him an obedient, gracious, loving, kind and patient heart. That he will grow to be a courageous, prophetic, worshiping, praying mighty man of God.
With this prayer I must endure the consequences, He. Is. Strong. Willed.
And with that I strongly believe in..this scripture: He who withholds his rod hates his son, But he who loves him disciplines him diligently.
Proverbs 13:23-25 :).

Take note: I do not beat my child. I discipline.

I believe in letting our children be creative, letting their active minds get to work. We let Julien bang on the drums, have loud toys, run, jump, climb, scream, laugh, play dangerously in kitchen (don't think into it), brush his own teeth, play with water, have tangled hair, wear cut up jeans...we let our child have freedom, as well as discipline. 

That is what I believe is lacking in the modern American home.

Our American culture gives children too much freedom, children are now able to choose their own Gender!? Read Here. 
We are allowing Gender Neutral bathrooms in our public schools?! Read Here
I agree with the Author of this Children Choose Gender article, an 18 month old does not know the difference between male and female yet, the parents have some serious directing to do. 

I was a Nanny the majority of my Teenage years, I have been in these homes I have seen the other side. This is why I have decided to raise my children the way that I am. I have heard the empty threats "Put that down or you'll get a spanking" 20 minutes later the child still hasn't obeyed and the parent has just left the room, time outs go from 2 minutes to 20 seconds.
The parents of America have become lazy and ignorant. 
When they are in public and their child starts raising hell at Denny's they act shocked like it never happens, unfortunately the child just doesn't know any better.
There is no discipline in these homes. 


A good friend of mine once told me 'there is no such thing as your child having a bad day, it is you that is having the bad day.' our children feed off of our attitudes, emotions, atmospheres.. 

Today Julien was cranky from not having a long enough nap before we made it to the restaurant for lunch (wouldn't you be cranky?), he did VERY well for his situation. He was very patient as we waited for the rest of our party and ate as many chips as he could until he got plain BORED. He lasted a good hour and half before it was just too much and we had to leave.
Unfortunately Julien never got to finish that nap, by the time it was 8pm and we were trying to watch a movie at my parents house he was ready to go home. I don't know how many times we had to pause the movie to hear it over his whiny 'i'm tired' cries, so it made me stressed...which made him stressed...which made everyone stressed...which made us go home early.
I have no one to blame but myself.


It is important to give your children artistic expression and freedom to become who God made them to be, but there is a reason you are an adult and God gave you that child, YOU are responsible for who that child becomes. You are the only one who can take credit for that amazing little person. People of America love your children!!  But please..don't forget to discipline them, there is a reason you are their parent.


 


 

Freed from weary chains...

It is official, I am (again) a stay at home mom.
Oh how I missed the days of snuggling with my JuBean til 9:30 in the morning. Having those days where you actually do nothing but watch movies, the freedom of planning an all day hang out day with your friends, mommy and me dates with other mother friends...

I was a SAHM for 16 months until I took this previous job, I was getting bored and decided I needed something part-time. Unfortunately a few months into the job things turned sour and not so 'part-time', I started missing Julien and our days of freedom and I was sad when I heard he was trying new things without me :(.

3 weeks after posting my last blog 'wishes of a SAHM' I was 'let-go' from my position. I held back my tears of joy and tried to hide the excitement that was welling up inside.
I have so many plans for this season in my life, First and foremost starting up Challah By Ima, homemade fresh Challah available to you in many different flavors for delivery or pick-up!

By starting Challah By Ima hopefully it will help me continue to be a SAHM and soon plan on babe #2?!

Stay tuned....
 

The wishes and woes of being a mother.

I'm not going to recap, basically Julien is a walking, talking todd almost 2! If you're a mother you know how that is.


My dream is to be a SAHM and care for Julien through his fits, tantrums, and laughs. I want to see him playing in the dirt, gardening and discovering new words. I want to be there for his first peanut butter and jelly, to clean his face before naptime, I want to see him...all day.

I'm working at a roofing company at the reception desk where you would assume the most traffic is and my days are still so lonely without my JuBug by my side. I cope with convincing them to buy a coffee machine so I can have unlimited caffeine to make my day go by faster, I find tedious paperwork to fill my time until the clock strikes 3:30, I zoom (65mph) through the traffic down 635, then 35, then loop 12, untl i hit a dead stop on 408, dare I take grady niblo's back road with speed humps to race to my Juj? Yes..Yes I do.

I've made it, he's either sound asleep and could care less if i'm there or he's distracted with Sabba. But..I don't care if he cares if i'm there or not..I care that i get to see him and watch him play, watch him do his hustle to the fridge for moi moi, I care that I don't miss the WHOLE afternoon and can see his sleepy head after a nap, I care that even tho he's acting too cool for school he probably pee'd in his diaper when he saw me.

My wish to be SAHM, it seems like such a long ways away, there needs to be a way for me to get out of this rut and live happily ever after with my Bug.




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*SAHM (stay at home mom). Inspired by @hellogiggles

Ch ch ch changes (turn and face the strain)

Changes
Changed
Change
Changing..

OH life.

Hunter and I have settled into our jobs new positions, promotions, raises..
We have bought our first car and the next step was to move out of my parents house.

I have lived there for 11 years, I have lived with my parents my entire life, I was NOT ready for this change.

We did the math, the budget, the thoughtful process to see how much we could afford. We were off to apartment hunt.
A lot of thought and prayer went into this decision, we spoke with our marriage counselors, prayed with the community, prayed as a small family and ultimately Hunter and I felt complete peace about this move.

We found an apartment 3 miles from my parents house, 2 bed 1 bath, and 1000+ sq ft.
It's wonderful.
We moved in 2/4/12 and it was bitter sweet. I cried the first 3 days, Julien was having a really hard time transitioning from a house FULL of people to a small apartment with just his Ima and Abba, it was heartbreaking.

When Hunter and I got married there was a severance between my parents and I and I remember sobbing, feeling like I was being ripped away from my parents who have covered me, provided for me, loved me and comforted me, all to be with the man God so eagerly placed in my life. It was joyous time as Hunter and I were beginning our lives together but a sad transition.

Moving into our own place just established that transition even more, not as brutal because I had already gone through the spiritual side of it but sad none the less.

My mom helped us move in and unpack but we didn't see my dad for 3 days, (sat-tues) by Monday Julien had lost it! he wasn't sleeping, he was constantly crying, throwing himself on the floor in little fits, dragging himself across the floor :( we HAD to see Sabba!!

Tuesday he spent all day with my Dad and they played and played by Wednesday morning he was a new kid! He was going to his OWN bed when i said it was time for nap or night night, get under the covers and lay his head down and say night night. Since we have lived in the apartment he has had 3 nights (separately) where he has slept ALL night!

This is a BIG deal! That 1 day with Sabba changed EVERYTHING!

We have settled in, had our housewarming party and are loving life! God is so good to provide! My parents still get to see Julien EVERY day (but maybe saturday)!!

Sleep I think I will go back to Sleep. -Imogen Heap

To start the weaning/transition to another bed thing takes guts.

I approached this 'slightly' early according to babycenter.com and multiple blogs I've read.
But, I was ready to sleep through the night and have more than a corner of my queen size bed back!

I started this about a week and half ago trying to figure out what 'method' would work best for me.
I started with laying with him in his bed until he fell asleep and I would sneak off. But low and behold 2 hours later he was up, then another 2 hours, then another and another until about 6am and he would wake up officially at 9:30am.
So I was in desperate need of another method. I read a blog by bigpreg.wordpress.com and I was inspired. I talked Hunter into waking up with Julien in the night instead of me!

After a few more days of me being exhausted and going back and forth between beds (mine and juliens) I had enough. Monday night was the night Hunter was taking over!

But unfortunately men don't have motherly instinct like women do, every time Julien woke up with his soft whimper I would pop up out of bed and then remember "it's not my night" so then I had to wake up Hunter. That happened twice until He realized "I'm not going to sleep tonight". By 8am Tuesday he was getting ready for work, exhausted and CRANKY. I just smiled and said 'welcome to my life, I can do it from now on if it's too hard."

Tuesday night came and Julien had an unexpected late nap so when he woke up at 7:30pm for dinner I had to keep him up a little later, but by 10:30 it was DEFINITELY time for bed. This had happened a few times before thinking if I keep him up late maybe he'll sleep through! But no such luck. So I wasn't anticipating a full nights sleep.

It was my night to wake up with Julien, I was geared up and made an easy path from my bed to his so I wouldn't step on any unsuspected toys. I fell asleep around 11:30 expecting to wake up by 12:30am to feed him one last time. But....the next thing I knew it was 6:23am!!!!!

I looked at Hunter (whose alarm went off for morning worship) and whispered "oh my gosh, he slept through the whole night. I'm so freaking excited!!!!!". We then attended morning worship in our living room and Julien didn't wake up until 8:15!!!!!!!
He was starving and my breast were about to pop so he enjoyed a nice full breakfast from both sides and I am probably the happiest mother right now.

I hope, I PRAY this lasts!! It was officially my FIRST FULL night of sleep in 14 MONTHS!

Dog, Car, JuJu and Ball.

What do these ^ words have in common? Julien has said them!!


There are times I wonder 'will he ever?' when it comes to different things. Standing, walking, talking, different things. And I'm having to realize all kids are different and Julien might not be as developed as the next kid in certain things!

He is an AWESOME listener, He can definitely understand me giving him directions.

On his FIRST Birthday he said Car and Dog!! We caught him saying Car on tape! It's so exciting! During peek-a-boo the other day no one said 'where's juju?!" So He said it himself! He said "nah JuJu!!" I was so excited I about screamed in his ear! Haha.
Today while rolling the ball around he crawled towards it and said Ball. SO clearly!

His Auntie ShooShoo (xaundelle) thinks it's hilarious that when he says words he says it SO clearly she thinks he's like stewie (from family guy). He says words like he's known them forever it's amazing.

To watch him grow right in front of me and change so much every day is so exciting!

Anyways.

Thanks to everyone for helping us celebrate Julien's birthday! We are so excited about our little ONE YEAR OLD!!